what is non-binary

Non-binary is a gender outside of the gender binary. Agender is having no gender. While some non-binary people are agender and all agender people are non-binary, non-binary can mean full of gender. The most common misconception about what it means to be non-binary is that all non-binary people don’t experience gender. This is false.


The first problem is that our perception of gender as a society is girl and boy, woman and man, female and male, feminine and masculine. We assume if someone is neither woman nor man, they must be agender. But we forget; there are so many other ways to experience gender beyond feminine and masculine! Being agender is perfectly valid, but it is not the same thing as being non-binary.


Gender Beyond the Binary

The experience of a gender that is neither feminine or masculine is the experience of non-binary gender. Contrary to what society tells us, there are so many ways to experience gender, not just two. It can be hard to put into words, as it is more of a feeling and experience than words can define. You do not have to personally understand it. Recognizing its existence and respecting it is what matters.


What Non-Binary Doesn’t Mean

Non-binary people aren’t limited to non-binary gender experiences. Non-binary people can experience femininity and masculinity in addition to androgyny and lack of gender. This means that a non-binary person can feel or dress feminine or masculine or both or neither. Their gender may be stagnant or it may change over time, sometimes frequently and sometimes less frequently. Non-binary is not one thing, one experience, one look, one way to be. Non-binary is many things and sometimes nothing. Everyone has a different experience.


Non-Binary is an Umbrella Term

Non-binary is an umbrella term for all genders that do not fall within the binary. This means agender, bigender, pangender, demigirl, demiboy, girlflux, boyflux, and genderfluid are all considered generally non-binary experiences. However, a non-binary person is not inherently any one of these other labels, and not all people who use one of these labels feel comfortable with the term non-binary, and that’s okay!


Dysphoria is Not Only for Certain Genders

Some people may think dysphoria is only experienced by transgender people that fall into the binary. It’s actually experienced by non-binary people and people under the non-binary umbrella as well. All non-cisgender people can experience gender dysphoria, but not all non-cisgender people do. Dysphoria is not what makes someone’s gender valid. However, many non-binary people do experience dysphoria and for this reason may bind, wear different clothing than before, or receive gender-affirming surgery.


Non-binary looks many different ways because non-binary can be experienced in many different ways. All are valid and all are beautiful.

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